I have my reasons.
Summer is always busy. This year's had several special items:
- Rose started school so we were spending a lot of time preparing (half day schedules work great for the kids but are a little complicated for working and childcare schedules) and "welcoming" events with her. I was just as giddy as she was - I loved school!
- We enjoyed a couple annual family vacations to northern Wisconsin (Clover Leaf Lakes with my side of the family and the Willow Flowage with Ben's side).
- We hosted Molly's first birthday party at our house in late August (i.e. cleaning and cooking).
- Ben and I had a couple weekend get-a-ways. First to my cousin's wedding in the Twin Cities and second was a late anniversary trip to Madison to re-trace the steps of our early dating and take in a Badger football game and Tim Hawkins comedy show.
- Sad item of the summer was that my best friend moved back to her hometown. So happy for her and her family, but such a difficult adjustment to not be just a quick drive away anymore.
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| So excited for school! |
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| Molly <3's dirt cake! |
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| By Monona Bay - site of our first date and later Ben proposed. |
Then the gray cloud of the past few months and a BIG reason I've been "silent" is that I basically had postpartum depression. "Aren't you a year late" you might ask? It was triggered by weaning Molly from nursing (I made it to a year!). My hormones went cRaZy! It was a really wild ride for about two months or so. I am really grateful for a few things through it - I recognized what it was pretty early on so I could cope with it better, re-affirmed that I have some amazing people in my life, gave me a very "real" experience of leaning on God and finding joy in Him despite my circumstances, and it gave me such a perspective on what others with various forms of depression are dealing with so I can love and encourage them so much better now than I could have before.
Fall - love/hate season. It's so beautiful and so fun to harvest the crops and see the results of the full year of planning and preparation. It's also the same time as Ben's other favorite past-time - bow hunting. So harvest + bow hunting = Nicole is a single parent. I wouldn't trade it for anything though. I fully knew this was who Ben was before I married him - it's who he is. He wouldn't be my husband if he didn't hunt and farm.
Lastly, I recently transitioned jobs. I'm sad to leave the Wisconsin FFA Foundation. It was six years of blood, sweat and tears mixed with such success, reward and personal growth. I'll never be very far from FFA though - I'll certainly be back at the convention and keep in touch with various people. Three weeks into my new job and I am really enjoying it! I'm my own business entity contracting with Beck Ag for projects as a market contact specialist. It gives me a sense of entrepreneurship that I love, along with working with a well-established, top-notch, values-driven company.
Through the past few months and all the above happenings, I almost gave up on blogging. Actually, I did make the decision to give it up. I was frustrated at my inconsistency. Also, I have a tons of ideas for the blog, but I have a lot of responsibilities that take priority over it so it's hard for me to settle for it being less than my best (sorry, little perfectionist tendency). It was Ben's encouragement that something is better than nothing. If he's my only fan, then I'm okay with that because he's my most important.
